insaneklown5000
Dark Initiate
Ringmaster
stupid people are like cockroaches you cant get rid of them and they multiply.
Posts: 11
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JOKES!
Jun 25, 2005 0:26:10 GMT -5
Post by insaneklown5000 on Jun 25, 2005 0:26:10 GMT -5
whats the best way to drown a blond?
put a sticker at the bottom of a pool and tell her its a scratch and sniff.
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JOKES!
Jul 7, 2005 20:27:59 GMT -5
Post by MirrorImage || egamIrorriM on Jul 7, 2005 20:27:59 GMT -5
two guys walked into a bar
the third guy ducked
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what do you do when a blond chucks a grenade at you?
you take out the pin and throw it back
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JOKES!
Jul 7, 2005 20:34:39 GMT -5
Post by MirrorImage || egamIrorriM on Jul 7, 2005 20:34:39 GMT -5
a minister and a nun were playing golf now, when the minister took a drive, he got about three feet away from the hole. when he took the put, he missed and said "aww, crap, i missed!" now the nun was a little put off by this, being a nun. but she held her tongue... the exact same thing happened at the next sixteen holes, and every time the minister said the same thing, "aww, crap, i missed!" on the last hole, the minister again got about three feet away from the hole. by this time, the nun was quite irritated with the minister, so before he took the put she asked him not to say that phrase again. she said "father, God will strike you dead if you use that phrase again" so, the minister took the put, missed, and of course, said: "aww, crap, i missed!" big, dark, rumbling clouds started circling around the golf course, and a bolt of lightening came down and struck the nun dead. a giant, booming voice said, "AWW, CRAP, I MISSED!"
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JOKES!
Jul 8, 2005 10:27:15 GMT -5
Post by MirrorImage || egamIrorriM on Jul 8, 2005 10:27:15 GMT -5
a man was driving home from work one day when his car broke down. he walked a little ways, then came upon a small motel. he went to the manager and told him he had no car, and no money, but he needed a room. the manager said, "well, theres a girl upstairs who needs to lose her virginity, and there's a bulldog in the shed who beeds to have a tooth removed." well, the guy thought that this was a good deal, so he agreed. he decided to get the bulldog done first, because that was the unenjoyable one, so he walked into the shed. moments later, the manager heard all manner of yelps, screams snarls, and ripping noises from the shed. the man walks back up to the manager, his clothes in tatters and bleeding all over, and says: "ok, so where's this girl with a toothache?"
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JOKES!
Aug 31, 2005 16:08:29 GMT -5
Post by Reaper696 on Aug 31, 2005 16:08:29 GMT -5
What do you call a horny Mormon?
A handyman
When is a joint not a joint?
When it's a blunt
How do you know the hooker's a little nasty?
When her nickname is "biohazard"
How can you tell a stoner's been on your fridge?
What fridge?
How can you tell if a blonde just farted?
All of a sudden you see a string on the back of her pants...
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JOKES!
Sept 11, 2005 16:06:44 GMT -5
Post by ImpendingDoom on Sept 11, 2005 16:06:44 GMT -5
a women is giving birth and shes in terrible pain so the doctor suggests a new method. he explained that it was a machine that when hooked up to the wife transferes the pain to the father. so the father said sure ill do it. so they hooked her up and turned it to the first notch but he didnt feel anything so they turned it up a couple of notches and still nothing. so the father says go ahead and turn it all the way up, and so he does. still nothing. so after they got home from the hospital the mail man was dead on the front porch
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JOKES!
Sept 11, 2005 16:16:10 GMT -5
Post by ImpendingDoom on Sept 11, 2005 16:16:10 GMT -5
a boy with a dead frog hanging from a string tied to his hand went into a whore house. one of the hookers said arent you a little young to be here. he said i got the money give me what i want. she said ok what do you want. he said i want your most nasty diseased whore you got. she asked why and he said so i can get a disease. she asked why and he said so i can sleep with my babysitter who will sleep with my dad who will sleep with my mom who will sleep with the mail man. she asked him why he wanted to do that and he said because the mail man stepped on my frog and killed it
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anubis13lade
Dark Initiate
life is judged by the unjudgable's
Posts: 74
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JOKES!
Sept 12, 2005 19:31:46 GMT -5
Post by anubis13lade on Sept 12, 2005 19:31:46 GMT -5
theres a black family and they go to the zoo the mom takes the younger kids to see the the desert animals and the dad takes the older half to see the monkeys. when the mom takes them to see the elephants the mom notices the male elephant's hmmmmm is drooping down and dragging on the Flore she tries to pull them away but the littles one tells her Mommy what is that. the mom replies thats nothing honey the little girl says but Mommy look at it what is it the mom replies nothing and if you ask one more time your going to get a beating. they walk off. the mom and dad switch and as the dads taking the little ones to see the monkeys but they pass the elephants agen. the little girl asked her dad what is that on the elephant. the dad gets nerves and tries to explain but the little girl interrupts and says but Mommy said that its nothing the dad replies thats because i spoil the bitch
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JOKES!
Sept 13, 2005 20:31:01 GMT -5
Post by MirrorImage || egamIrorriM on Sept 13, 2005 20:31:01 GMT -5
you are about to witness what is possibly the most blashpemous joke in existence....
why did Jesus die on the cross?
[glow=red,2,300] because he forgot his safe word![/glow]
for any of you who dont know....which is sad enough, considering this site....a "safe word" is what S&M participants say when they have had enough....
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anubis13lade
Dark Initiate
life is judged by the unjudgable's
Posts: 74
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JOKES!
Sept 14, 2005 21:20:45 GMT -5
Post by anubis13lade on Sept 14, 2005 21:20:45 GMT -5
i really don't think so blasphemy has not seeing this one
how is Jesus and a picture different
you can hang a picture with one nail
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JOKES!
Sept 14, 2005 21:22:59 GMT -5
Post by MirrorImage || egamIrorriM on Sept 14, 2005 21:22:59 GMT -5
i dunno, they're both pretty bad...but the S&M reference kinda takes the cake.....
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JOKES!
Sept 17, 2005 21:39:01 GMT -5
Post by Time_Spinner on Sept 17, 2005 21:39:01 GMT -5
Okay, I was in my english class and we all wanted to go home when the teacher said, "There'e going to be a test the next day, and I'll take no excuses unless you are sick." One smart-aleck student yelled, "What if you suffer from severe sexual exhaustion?" And the whole class started cracking up. OUr teacher glared at him and said, "No Excuses. You can use your other hand to write."
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JOKES!
Sept 17, 2005 21:59:38 GMT -5
Post by MirrorImage || egamIrorriM on Sept 17, 2005 21:59:38 GMT -5
oh, that is f*cking hilarious....my teachers would get fired for saying that...
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Daemonized
Crimson Soul
There are noises in the dark ... the owners of which ... are better not to behold
Posts: 138
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JOKES!
Nov 11, 2005 17:16:12 GMT -5
Post by Daemonized on Nov 11, 2005 17:16:12 GMT -5
Two farmers, Frik and Johan, are walking in the middle of the bush when suddenly a huge ape jumps down from a tree. Frik shouts, slaps the ape and pulls out his dick. The ape looks confused but gets down and gives the farmer a blowjob. Johan just stands there dumbfounded. The ape finishes and sits down and Frik turns to Johan and says, "Hey, do you want a turn?". To which Johan replies, " Ja, but just don't hit me that hard!"
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JOKES!
Nov 12, 2005 23:04:57 GMT -5
Post by MirrorImage || egamIrorriM on Nov 12, 2005 23:04:57 GMT -5
oh, im going to go be sick now...
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