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Post by Lina Inverse on Dec 24, 2003 14:20:15 GMT -5
Why end the pain And change it to joy?
Pain soothes me Massages me Pain always comforting Never faltering
Joy, on the other hand A ticking time bomb Building up swiftly Exploding into naught but hurt
They all say to Replace the pain with joy Why? When joy is pain And pain is joy
Why does it matter What I choose When they both End up the same?
Pain is my want Shouldn't I aim for that? Joy is not Shouldn't I despise it?
I don't want to be happy I hate being happy But all want me happy Blindly follow their wishes
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CrimsonAngel
Demon Disciple
.Fallen from the broken gates of heaven
Posts: 305
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Post by CrimsonAngel on Dec 24, 2003 14:22:10 GMT -5
I really like this one....Its so true....People say to stop the pain, but what if you like it.....I really like this one, I already said that.....heh, I can really relate....this is a good write!
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Post by softspokenlies078 on Dec 28, 2003 9:15:09 GMT -5
good poem it's a lot easier to keep on hurting when being happy could make you hurt worse or thats how i see it any way great job -Jess
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AxXis
Crimson Soul
I know the pale thing in the darkest of places.
Posts: 218
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Post by AxXis on Dec 29, 2003 19:31:38 GMT -5
Good write, I really like the lines, 'Joy, on the other hand A ticking time bomb Building up swiftly Exploding into naught but hurt' This instantly made me smile. If there is anything wrong at all with this piece it would be the end. I've read some excellent poems of yours and I believe that you can come up with a better way to close this one. All in all this is a good peice though.
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Post by :.:.:KrO NiC DaZe:.:.: on Dec 31, 2003 3:36:43 GMT -5
I really like the meaning of this poem...as for the poem itself I didn't really like...The reason being is that it didn't rhyme and most poem that don't rhyme have longer bars and stanzas...I think it would have been alot better if it rhymed, or like I said, if the bars and stanzas were longer
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