DarkenTheSky
Demon Disciple
Beneath the Watery Lust Garden, my Secret Lies. . .
Posts: 392
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Post by DarkenTheSky on Nov 10, 2003 5:39:40 GMT -5
I look out my window And only see darkness, And my rotting carcass, In the reflection.
My life's riding free, On the hands of my clock, My coffin is locked, And I'm buried alive.
I have no more issues, I've already died.
You're pushing me closer To the edge then I've ever been, And now I'm attempting Suicide again.
Someday you'll see "Attempted Suicide Twelve times before she died" On my tombstone.
I took a simple death, And made it complicated, Because life was what I hated. There were so many times I tried All the different ways to die.
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Post by black jewelled rain on Dec 3, 2003 15:40:59 GMT -5
This is another great poem, although it seemed to end suddenly. I'm not saying it's a bad thing, though! It could be symbolic of your death. Hmm...interesting idea. I liked the two lines that stood apart from the rest of the poem. It emphasised their significance.
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Mistress
Demon Disciple
Eternally Damned
Posts: 405
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Post by Mistress on Dec 22, 2003 21:27:42 GMT -5
I enjoyed this poem very much. Yet another great one you've done. Everything about it is good, although the ending doesn't seem so much like an ending. You could probably extend it a bit...
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