RobbedofPurity
Dark Initiate
im sorry, i really felt that, you felt so much more
Posts: 63
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Post by RobbedofPurity on Jun 17, 2004 22:21:29 GMT -5
my first attempt at song writting.. i know it sucks, but oh well. i was perfect clear skin, doe eyed Blood pulsed, visibly, under translucent skin my clothes all fit just right.
i discovered you you senced my innocence used me, then you broke me youve broken my heart
did i not tell you i was new you her me scream, agonizingly as my insides tear in two did i not tell you i was new
an endless flow of letters followed up intensive dates you pulled me off a ledge made me fall in love, and i fell hard
did i not tell you i was new you her me scream, agonizingly as my insides tear in two did i not tell you i was new
made a descition (should never have let you do it) warm hands crept up my thighs you explored the plaid and white. i was robbed of purity in a bathroom stall.
now im broken blotched face, red eyes scars rip through the moonlight and all my clothes are loose
did i not tell you i was new you her me scream, agonizingly as my insides tear in two did i not tell you i was new (2x)
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Post by littleskinny on Jul 5, 2004 5:12:45 GMT -5
I don't come in here much...but I might now...I loved this...it's definitely lyrical rather than poetry, and the subject matter is close to my heart - good write
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Post by :.:.:KrO NiC DaZe:.:.: on Jul 15, 2004 19:37:50 GMT -5
Don't lie, you know this shit was good as f*ck....only one thing:::
this sounds alot like something I've heard before....as a whole the song seemed very orginal except for that part...just my opinion...otherwise...Good Shit!
Later, Daze
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Post by ruination on Jul 23, 2004 2:16:38 GMT -5
that kicked ass. i particuarly like the flow and its sense of reality... no pretty words trying to soften the meaning. her should be here and descition should be decision and senced should be sensed.
made a descition (should never have let you do it) warm hands crept up my thighs you explored the plaid and white. i was robbed of purity in a bathroom stall.
that part really stuck out at me. great write.
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