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Post by JoyousMournings on Jan 11, 2005 11:30:34 GMT -5
Standing tall against something unfathomable Such beautiful impossibility Fear surges mightily like lightning But then there was laughter
Bars crushed upon our souls strangling the child within Of whom can not possibly rid itself of the one without, skepticism is failure
Impossibility is neat.
Screams of long tented rage can fill The Grand Canyon full to brim And the walls will fall and we will be free time and time again
And then there was laughter It seemed irrelevant and unwanted shrieking merrily under pressure Such an odd occurance it was...
That we were forced to giggle.
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Post by Yossarian on Jan 11, 2005 12:32:42 GMT -5
wonderful, simply wonderful...loved your last line, great stuff right there...although it didn't start out so funny, I got a real kick out of it...
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Post by Kitten on Jan 11, 2005 17:37:00 GMT -5
This is too heavy, stuffy and bulky on the language to be amusing! Think this might belong more in the darker corners of Dark Star .
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Post by LORDMORNINGSTAR on Jan 11, 2005 17:40:11 GMT -5
Actually this really made me smile a very sinister smile... and chuckle a very grim chuckle... it is comedy, satire done sardonically perhaps....
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Post by JoyousMournings on Jan 12, 2005 11:27:21 GMT -5
The idea was in darker jest, yes. I was amused when writing it. Watching Psycho Beach Party.. That movie is so stupid it's funny.
I was trying to portray humor in the worst, most sinister situations. That's half my humor, there.
Thank you.
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queenie
Demon Disciple
Timor mortis conturbat me.
Posts: 539
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Post by queenie on Jan 19, 2005 20:57:02 GMT -5
Great poem, but I would agree a lil to dark for humor. Though thematically the ideas of inappropriate laughter holds well together.
Q
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Post by carpenoctern on Jan 23, 2005 13:21:30 GMT -5
dark humor, nothing quite like it. I loved this. Ending was a lot better than the beginning
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Post by JoyousMournings on Feb 18, 2005 20:56:44 GMT -5
Thank you for your feedback! :grinface:
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