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Post by NikesRain on Sept 19, 2005 3:46:33 GMT -5
bring me decadence wrap your kiss around my longing steal my voice so the only sound is my ragged breath and the only word i know is your name
paint me perfection with hands like michaelangelo hands entwined in hair captured surrendering as a whisper of blissful torture rakes across my mind like a lightningbolt and i'm ignited in the flames of your arson
bind me to your midnight with promises of exquisite hours drowing in your touch that plays me like a violin perfectly tuned to you and i'll sing your sensuality forever
engulf me in a fantasia that knows no bounds until i'm writhing in euphoria begging you to inject my soul with your caress and i'm mapping your skin with my razored fingers like a crimson inked treasure map
devour me in you in your eyes while you inject mine with stars i'll show your soul what god really looks like and i'll ask only one thing from the beginning bring me decadence sweet upon a wish Copyright 2005 d r davis
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rezel
Dark Initiate
Lacrimarum
Posts: 70
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Post by rezel on Sept 26, 2005 3:10:15 GMT -5
Nice write! I enjoyed the images and the words ... I like the beginning especially, as I know how powerful and personal names are... bring me decadence wrap your kiss around my longing steal my voice so the only sound is my ragged breath and the only word i know is your name /center]
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Post by cavenerd on Sept 28, 2005 14:00:09 GMT -5
Whew! Is it hot in here, or is it just me? ~grin~
The smoothly flowing verse compliments the feeling of lusty emotion that infuses this piece.
Loved it!
Cavenerd
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DarkenTheSky
Demon Disciple
Beneath the Watery Lust Garden, my Secret Lies. . .
Posts: 392
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Post by DarkenTheSky on Sept 29, 2005 0:35:24 GMT -5
i loved all of your metaphors! beautiful way to describe passion, and perfect title.
"steal my voice so the only sound is my ragged breath and the only word i know is your name
paint me perfection with hands like michaelangelo "
alright, well i was going to tell you the parts that really made this piece great to me, but as i was lookin for specific pieces, i would have had to re post the entire poem to enform you of my opinions. =) been a while since i've read a poem on this subject in general, but the language you used to describe this really did the actual expirience of such times justice.
makes me miss the feeling =p
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Post by Yossarian on Sept 29, 2005 13:53:25 GMT -5
f*cking great line, I loved this!
beautiful imagery in here, I loved this stanza!
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Post by NikesRain on Sept 30, 2005 10:26:09 GMT -5
thank you all for your kind words, i appreciate your opinions
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